Overcoming Over-giving

Art by @jules tillman

Art by @jules tillman

I come from a maternal lineage of over-givers… 
So when I became a mother I naturally started to give my 100% and fell in the over-giving trap myself.
So many of us give to our children, to our partners, to our friends and our communities before we give to ourselves.
Because we have been conditioned to do so, because we think, “Who else will if I don't?”. We rarely question the mental charge we are holding because we have been raised in a culture were an over-giving and over-sacrificing mother is expected and valued.
I say WTF! 
A wise woman once said (or was it a flight-attendant?):
“You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you help put on anyone else’s.”
Sometimes one simple question to ask ourselves is: “What would it look like to do the opposite: nourishing ourselves first before giving to others?”
And the simple answer is to realize that we will likely over-give anyway BUT we can also actively engage in self-care practices so that we can replenish our own stores of energy and give energy to others as overflow. 
It may sounds obvious but it is ESSENTIAL and honestly who really does it?
The key here is to start prioritizing yourself no matter what.
Otherwise you’ll soon get spiraling in the over-giving trap again...
>> Self-Prioritizing practice:
So this week’s Essential Practice is up to you, but it is Mandatory (Mwahaha!)

You can choose to:

  • Take yourself out for lunch or for a treat!

  • Take a 5 senses bath ritual ❤

  • Do nothing (it IS doing something), or dance, journal, create... 

But whatever you do, make it special and make it yours!
Step 1
Schedule it! (Now before you forget).
How would you remember something important like taking your child to the dentist? You would schedule it, right?
Step 2
Do it and enjoy it, you totally DESERVE this.
Then notice how you are after with your children and your partner… take notes and repeat often!
I would love to hear what is your self-prioritizing practice. Let me know what are your ways to refill your own cup!


PS: Check out my 5 senses bath ritual (previous blog post)